2011 Christmas heralded a new season of attacks on the English language in my household. But who is right?
I can be one of the greatest language rule breakers when I choose. Yet even I struggle to embrace the new strain of Christmas sofa slump-chat that has emerged from my teenagers' happy obsession with programmes like 'Friends' and 'Two and a Half Men'. For Hark! We have heralded the birth of a whole new style of Anglo-US Yuletide greetings.
Squeaks of "What are we doing on Christmas?" found me churlishly grunting "Don't you mean - what are you we doing for Christmas Day?". Yells of "Where are you going for New Year?" made me bark back "It's called New Year's Eve over here". And "Leave a cookie out for Santa" produced a jolly retort of "He's called Father Christmas in this country and he likes biscuits".
Now I love nothing better than a dreamy all American viewing of 'White Christmas' or 'How The Grinch Stole Christmas' or 'It's A Wonderful Life'. Yet a desire for a place for everything and everything in its place, leads me to cling onto our fine English traditions of Christmas greeting.
The next battle in this wordy war of family festive feeling, is whether we should write our cards with a 'Merry Christmas' or 'Happy Christmas'. The general feeling in my house was that it should be 'Merry Christmas' leading to 'Happy New Year' to strike the difference.
A little research revealed that in the UK, 'Merry' is traditionally used in association with Christmas to mean jovial or cheerful. In fact, the word Christmas comes from Cristes mæsse - or Christ's Mass, which brings us to the hoary subject of religion. Should you ignore the whole religious message and just go for that bland compromise of 'Happy Holidays!'
Then there's the 'X Factor' in 'Xmas' - very useful for texting and writing at speed. The word 'Xmas', where 'X' replaces the word Christ' from Christmas, dates back to the early days of Christianity, when the Greek letter 'X' was the first letter in Christ (Χριστος).
I always used to think 'Xmas' was a bit of a cut-price Asda greeting. But now I know it's from early Greek, I shall use it with the richness of spirit it deserves. So back to that old chestnut, the word 'Merry', actually comes from 'myrige', originally meaning 'pleasant, and agreeable" rather than joyous, as in the phrase "Merry month of May".
Although Christmas has been observed since the 4th century AD, the first known usage of any Christmas greeting dates back to 1565, when it appeared in The Hereford Municipal Manuscript: "And thus I comytt you to God, who send you a mery Christmas."
My savvy tenagers opt for the phrase "Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year" as a great 'two for one' bargain offer that incorporates both greetings.
Apparently this message goes back to an informal letter written by an English admiral in 1699. The same phrase was contained in the sixteenth century secular English carol, 'We Wish You a Merry Christmas' and the very first commercial Christmas card, produced in England in 1843.
However, the real reason behind your careful choice of greeting, simply comes down to your relationship with alcohol. Probably because of the attempts made by the strict Methodist Victorian middle-classes to separate the wholesome celebration of the Christmas season from common lower-class public insobriety and anti-social behaviour. This was a time where 'merry' was understood to mean 'tipsy' or 'drunk'.
The final line written in 1823 in American poet Clement Moore's poem 'A Visit from St. Nicholas', read "Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night," was changed in later editions to the more sober salutation, 'Happy Christmas to all'.
Indeed, our own Queen Elizabeth II is said to prefer 'Happy Christmas' for this very reason.
So, if you're offering a friend or neighbour a festive tipple, maybe that's when you should go for a full on boozy 'Merry Christmas', but if it's to your local police station or head teacher, better stick to a safe and steady 'Happy Christmas'.
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